My salad dressing days


Three things I did not say to my masseuse
January 24, 2009, 11:41 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

Asking me to choose from an array of five essential oils depending on my emotional state, I wondered whether she had one entitled ‘Wound up after a morning spent with squabbling four year olds’, but said ‘um, a bit stressed – how about the lavender?’

Asked whether the pressure she was applying to my tense neck and shoulders was sufficient, I wanted to say ‘No, I want to be pummelled to a pulp!’ but was concerned she’d think I had stumbled into her massage parlour expecting an entirely different kind of experience. So I said: ‘Yeah, it’s great, thanks!’

‘Nooooooooooooooooo! Whale song would be preferable to pan pipes!’

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