My salad dressing days


Job specification
September 29, 2008, 10:18 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

Qualities required:

  • Ability to sympathise and commiserate
  • Ability to deliver hammed up and overly earnest pieces to camera as and when the occasion requires
  • Ability to nod sagely whilst listening to tales of woe
  • Ability to whoop excitedly at the good fortune of others

Chief duties:

  • Bear-hugging strangers
  • Backpatting and/or high-fiving men underconfident about their sexuality
  • Dispensing tissues to weeping women who have forgotten to apply waterproof mascara
  • Standing in large stadiums with hundreds of over-excited teenagers whilst a camera crew in a helicopter spend five hours getting the best panning shot

The successful candidate:

 

Dermot O'Leary

Dermot O

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