My salad dressing days


Tile-induced tedium
August 22, 2007, 2:00 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

We go to The Posh Tile Shop (TPTS). We know we won’t be buying tiles from TPTS but we can dream, right? And we’re looking for inspiration, says Mr Chick. Inspiration-hunting? Nothing to be ashamed of.

TPTS is indeed quite posh. And quite expensive. And the chicklets immediately lunge for some slate tiles stacked precariously on the floor, so we don’t stay long. But we buy the brochure (yes, that posh). The shop assistant tosses a paint colour swatch (now free!) into our bag and sends us on our way with a smile that indicates her relief at the prospect of two three-year-olds leaving the premises.

Later in the week, we go to The Cheap-o Tile Store (TCTS). Really there isn’t any need to prefix their company name with ‘discount’ because everyone knows ‘store’ equals cheap and ‘shop’ equals more expensive.

We wander up and down the aisles in bewilderment. There is a lot of sighing. There is some flustered muttering along the lines of ‘how the heck did we ever think we quite fancied building our own house when we can barely choose tiles for a new bathroom’. There are some admissions that the house-building idea was only ever a ploy to try to become friends with Kevin McCloud.

We hang, like flies over dog dirt, around the stone tiles section. We hum and haw and sigh some more. A man starts yelling ‘Are we winning?’ and I imagine he is referring to some local derby that he is missing on account of having to follow arguing couples round TCTS. But no, he is not talking of that game with one ball and eleven men with which most of the planet, except me and Mr Chick, is obsessed. We turn around and he looks us in the face and asks again: ‘Anything take your fancy? Are we winning?’

‘No, we’re arguing.’

‘Oh. Well, can I help at all?’

We tell him our tale of woe. High ceilings. North-facing aspect. Haven’t measured anything yet. Not sure about: colour scheme, tile type, exact location of sanitary ware, existence of God. Et cetera.

He retreats a little.

‘Well, OK…um, give me a yell if you need any help or samples or anything.’

We are not winning.

So we go to Starbucks.

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8 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Please tell me you’ll be hiring a professional to do the tiling…..?

Comment by WinterWheat

heavens, yes!

and the big fat irony is that we ended up getting tiles at the posh place (mr chick pointing out every five minutes that we were basically buying the cheapest stock they had!)

hey ho…

Comment by Urban Chick

Yes, you went to Starbucks… and then had to decide whether to have cappuccino, latte, americano, tea, hot chocolate, frappuccino, full-fat, semi-skimmed, skimmed, tall, grande, with whipped cream, extra foam, with an extra shot, decaf…

Comment by schoolgatemum

If it’s the posh tile shop I’m thinking of, then I’m hugely impressed. I’ve never done more than stand with my nose pressed against the glass, looking in.

Sometimes you see something and just know it’s right, even if it is in the posh shop!

Comment by Marsha Klein

choice paralysis is a killer. Just wait til you get to carpets. But you got away “lightly” – we did the round and round and round and there and back again in out in out back to the first place about a thousand times. Happy weekends. Lots of them. Kinda miss it all now.

Comment by Milla

Hi UC! You are brave. I shudder to think of the time when we have to start choosing bits ands pieces for finishing our basement. Two very analytical people together on a project can really bog it down 🙂

hope that you and the chicklets and your long suffering husband are doing well.

Comment by Kyahgirl

the problem is all those decisions feel so terribly meaningful, don’t they? I am rubbish at interior design decisions for the same reason. Absolutely rubbish.

Comment by thalya

I get frustrated too easily when shopping for home-related stuff and often just retreat to Starbucks in an annoyed huff.

Now I want Starbucks.

Comment by MsPrufrock




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