My salad dressing days

Ode to Jon Snow
November 30, 2006, 10:41 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

My evenings ceased to be a bore
When editors at Channel Four
Decided to remove your desk.
(Some viewers thought it quite grotesque.)
Not me, for I was thrilled to see
Your legs, your socks, your shin, your knee.
And gosh, you’re tall! And silver-haired!
Those funky ties! Oh how I stared
At you the only time we’ve met.
Awestruck, I broke out in a sweat.
Later we met outside the loo.
I couldn’t think quite what to do:
‘I love you, Jon! You’re really great!’
‘Does cycling ever make you late?’
‘Just how is your cousin Peter?’
‘How big is a cubic metre?’
Instead I simply shuffled by –
My plan, by now, had gone awry.
A chance at friendship did I blow
With the fantastical Jon Snow.

[Big fan. Heeeyoooge fan. Love ya, Jon.]

This poem is the third in a series of odes to male newscasters. Look, I spent a lot of my late twenties and early thirties watching and listening to a lot of news, alrighty? If you liked this, you might also like ‘Ode to Ed Stourton’ and ‘Advice for to Mark Austin’. Or not. *shrugs shoulders*


10 Comments so far
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Heeheee, lovely. When I first read Lord of the Rings I involuntarily pictured Elrond as looking like Jon Snow only with long hair. So now whenever I watch Ch4 news some part of my brain is picturing him in battle with the Last Alliance against Sauron.

I once saw Michael Burke on the escalator in Oxford Circus. Surely folk like him get cars sent for them?

Comment by violetforthemoment

I saw Ed Stourton at a conference recently. He has much nicer glasses now. He looked like a rugby prop. mmmm

Comment by GreatSheElephant

Jon Snow …*would*, it’s the socks.

Comment by realdoc

I know he’s possibly a little bit out of my age range, but me too.

I like that Alex Thompson as well, and that enthusiastic chap that comes on and talks about economic stuff I don’t understand.

Ch 4 News – there’s no contest.

Comment by Spinsterella

I sat next to Jon Snow at the cinema once. He had a sickeningly nice-looking middle class family (presumably his own) with him. I wanted him to adopt me on the spot. He is ENORMOUSLY tall. (Unlike Paxo who is, they say, a total midget.)

Comment by BiB

Just tried (unsuccessfully) to email you, as I think we might possibly have met in RL. Do you know the German bakery in Bruntsfield Place at all?

wv: nsipid = the food at office Christmas parties

Comment by Marsha Klein

i think i know the bakery although i’ve never been in…


email addy is urbanchickadee at gmail dot com IYSWIM

Comment by Urban Chick

spinny: do you mean faisal islam or liam halligan?

(liam halligan is the one with the brylcreemed hair who talks about economics as if he was addressing an audience of pre-school children)

Comment by Urban Chick

I must confess to a fondness for Alex Thomson…

Comment by melody nelson

Being in the US I have no idea who he is but your poem is as cute as can be.

Comment by pissed off patricia

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