My salad dressing days


Wise words from our Gwynnie
September 10, 2005, 11:41 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

I’ve just bought the first edition of a new magazine entitled ‘Psychologies’. Its French equivalent is said to sell hundreds of thousands of copies, and the British version describes itself as ‘the first women’s magazine that’s about what we’re like, not just what we look like’.

Given my tormented relationship with most women’s glossies, I’m feeling somewhat skeptical, but I’m willing to give it a whirl…

The most fleeting of glances brings to my attention some lovely little nuggets, which I feel the need to share with you, so as you too might benefit from the wisdom contained therein:

“Can’t say no to a Chocolate Fudge Dream? People are more likely to opt for a dessert if it has a dramatic-sounding name.” (p.29)

Wow. This is quite some revelation. Hey, Nigella! Quit licking your fingers and starting thinking up a new name for ‘Bread and butter pudding’.

“The average child laughs around 300 times a day. Whereas the average adult laughs only 17 times a day.” (p.26)

Goodness! Does this mean we all need regression therapy to get happy? Need.To.Know.

But this is by far and away my favourite: “Gwyneth admits she sometimes dines in the nude to avoid over-eating.” (p.25)

Now, I came close to liking Gwynnie, but then I heard a couple of less-than-endearing stories about her from a friend and then there was ‘Apple’ etc.

But, whatever my feelings towards her, I will now be keeping a much closer eye on her comings and goings. [“Last night Gwyneth dined out at The Ivy with husband Chris Martin. Being a cold October evening, with Ms Paltrow in the buff, the couple’s limousine pulled up to within inches of the main entrance. Mr Martin was reported to have had steak Diane with an extra helping of fries followed by Chocolate Fudge Dream. Ms Paltrow, it is said, enjoyed a green salad followed by a handful of sunflower seeds.”]

[Feel the need for some more bitching about Gwyneth? Then head over to Katiedid’s blog. Right, gotta scoot. I’m off to do the ‘How strong are your boundaries?’ quiz…]

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8 Comments so far
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Dining in the nude? For god’s sake! I used to work with a woman who would buy food for lunch that she hated the taste of, so that she wouldn’t eat it. People are nuts.

Comment by Meegan

I, like Gwyneth and Chris, follow a strict macrobiotic diet which will allow me to live to 134. Just think, I’ll be drinking and smoking till 134!Thanks, Gwynnie and Chris!

Comment by Wyndham

Hm, actually dining in the nude might have one good advantage for me. I am a chronic spiller. No matter how hard I try, I inevitably end up dropping or dripping something on my clothes, especially salad dressing. This would clearly solve my laurdry problem with stains! My god, that Gwyneth is a genius. Of course, I have a hunch if I dine out my fellow diners will not appreciate this. And then there’s the question of where to put the napkin. And soup! What if your eating hot soup and it dribbles? My god, there are places I really don’t want scalding liquid reaching. Perhaps I’ll just stick with the whole clothes at the suppertable thing, after all.

Comment by katiedid

apparently, chris ‘hates capitalism’

so i’m guessing that means he doesn’t want us to buy his new album and i’m guessing that means he’s going to allow anyone and everyone to download it for free online

like i say, i’m just guessing…

Comment by Anonymous

waiting with baited breath to hear what you learned about your boundaries! 🙂

Comment by Kyahgirl

wow that is some good gwynnie gossip!

Comment by Xtine

Oh, I bought that magazine too. After getting depressed by the result for Who do you Think You Are (the Repressed Self, yeuch), I fell at the hurdle of identifying my core values. How the hell do you choose between ‘respect’, ‘health’, ‘children’, ‘travel’, ‘integrity’ and ‘compassion’? They seem to me to be completely different sorts of things. In what world is ‘travel’ a core value?????? And then the list of things you want to avoid – ‘rejection’, depression’, ‘frustration’, ‘humilaition’, ‘guilt’. Er – I’ll avoid them all, thanks…

If I ate in the nude, at least I wouldn’t spill pasta sauce on my clothes as I usually do.

Comment by Lulu

Gywnnie?! *BARF*

Totally could do with giving her a few good “get that smug look of yer face” whacks.

That totally ridiculous Oscar crying jig… don’t know how any man can screw that woman after watching that little bit of melodrama.

Comment by SBB




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